Freedom

This morning, I was reading in Psalm 119 while I sipped my coffee and watched my little boy zoom his trucks over the rug. I had to keep saying "Shh, don't wake up the girls" because I'm always hoping for a little more peace... but anyways, while I was reading, in between Shhing, I just stayed for a while on verse 32. It says, "I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free". Isn't that beautiful? I'm not just stumbling through His path, I can run free only because HE has set my heart free. That whole little section of Psalm 119 is so precious- it says in verse 30- "I have chosen the way of truth, I have set my heart on your laws."

I so much want that to be true of me. I want to be able to say that I have chosen His truth over my lies and the lies of the Accuser. When I hear the harsh whisper or violent shout of accusation that I am NOT good enough and I have no right to come to a HOLY God with my petty problems, I can say NO, I have chosen His truth. His truth that says that I am precious in His sight, I am beloved. The earth is filled with His love (Psalm 119:64)

Lately, I'm having such a hard time seeing anything but the spiritual life around me- every moment seems so holy and precious- when I watch my little guy playing, I see the HAND of God on him, I remember how God gave him strength and filled his lungs with breath those first scary few days. I think of how he prays, in his little 2 year old voice, and how he thanks God for EVERYTHING. "Thank you for a good day, thank you for hot dogs, thank you for mommy...." and on and on.

There just is no life without God. It's harder and harder for me to fathom how anyone can survive a day living in their own strength. It breaks my heart. God is so good to us- I truly can say "I am a STRANGER on earth, do not hide your commands from me. My soul is consumed with longing for your laws at ALL times" (Ps 119:20-21)