The Treasure

Jeremiah 9:23-24 says "Thus says the Lord: “Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord.” 

I read those verses recently while on a little trip with my husband in Florida. I was sitting on a balcony, watching the ocean, feeling peaceful, casually reading along when it seemed like a spotlight shone right on those 2 verses. I stopped, read them again, and again, and again and to be honest, I haven't stopped thinking about them yet. It's been about 2 weeks.... The part that most intrigues me is how the Lord says that he who boasts can boast in the fact that he understands and KNOWS God. It is possible to understand and know God. My heart beats with that passion- to know God, to fall deeper and deeper into His steadfast love, justice, and righteousness, to understand His delight in all of His creation, His hope for the future, His sorrow for the brokenness of the present. I want to know Him and in these verses I see the promise that my desire is not just a dream. I can know God. 

Recently I also spent quite a bit of time pondering the verses in Philippians 3 that talk about Pauls "one thing". His one desire was to press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. When I look back through the book of Philippians, Paul talks on about how he counts everything as loss in order that he might gain Christ and be found in Him and then in 3:10, he says "That I may KNOW Him and the power of His resurrection". Paul's life was to know God. It's not that he didn't love those he was serving and teaching, it's not that he didn't work hard at anything his hand found to do, but underneath it all, his ONE THING was to know God and the power of His resurrection. The love and service and teaching naturally flowed from his heart because he understood the heart of God. When you know God, how can you not overflow with Him? God cannot be contained in my humanness- that's like saying the ocean could be contained in a coffee cup. When I make knowing God my sole desire and chief purpose in all that I do, everything He is floods over my weak human self. I can love because He is love, I can be brave because He is always in me, I can be strong because His strength gives me power, I can be wise because He is the author of all wisdom. It's always Him. Always. 

While I've been contemplating this, I can't help but think of the story Jesus told in Matthew 13:44. He said "The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy, he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field." 

The more these words of God have steeped into my soul, the more I am bubbling over with joy at the thought that I can possess this incredible treasure- this precious gift- of knowing God. I would joyfully give all I have, all I could ever be, to know Him more. I don't mean to make light of the gifts He has given me in my life but compared to Him, they really just don't matter. It's not the gifts I want, it's the Giver. I know that all He has given me demonstrates His precious, never ending, amazing love that He has for me. But it's always about Him, never about the gift. He is priceless to me. 

Of course, it's easy to rest in this joy right now- it's late at night, my kids are sweetly sleeping, my puppy is snuggled next to me (he's a snuggly little guy), my house is quiet, the dishwasher is running, life is good. I know in too few hours, I will be awake, feeling groggy from this late night, trying to hear through the chaos, and desperate for a word from God. So in those moments, how does knowing God change me? 

I'm not sure if I can explain but I know it has to do with making Christ my treasure. When I look at all the ugliness that can happen in a moment, the kids screaming, the misunderstandings, the endless laundry, it's like the treasure of Christ and His love for us all is buried under too many rocks and clods of mud. I can't see it or feel it or even really know for sure if it's there. But, if I can stop a minute, think of what is buried there, breathe... I can see that all these hurts and heartaches, while they do matter, they don't matter as much to me as actually seeing Jesus in that moment. Can I look at my fighting girls, screaming ugly words at each other, and somehow know Jesus more? Can I see His face as He dies to save us from the twisted bitterness of selfishness? Can I help my girls to know that the way of the cross is always better?

When I look at my pile of dishes and think of how I have a million things to do in the next 2 hours and no time for what I really want to do or what I really know is important, can I know God better even then? Can I trust His steadfast love? Can I calm down, can I really believe that there is no emergency with God, that He always knows and always has a plan? Can I let go of my control and rest in His and joyfully proceed with the work ahead of me? 

When I do stop and look at Jesus and try to find something new to understand about Him in every moment, it feels like I'm giving all I have to buy a field that I KNOW has a treasure beyond compare. I would willingly sacrifice all of my need to be in charge, my need to be right, my need to feel loved and respected, if I could only know Jesus and know the power of His resurrection coursing through me and making all the dead places alive in my heart. 

He is the treasure. Not just knowledge about Him, not just words written on a page that tell me something new, but Him. His loving, amazing, surprising, awesome Self. I really don't think it would ever be possible to be so enthralled with a mere man- only Jesus could ever captivate my entire being in this way. He is my pearl of great price, my precious coin, my hidden treasure.